[best read with a drunken, Irish brogue]
Is this a case of Spy vs Spy? Could we have Ryan vs Ryan in the House of Representatives? We already have Paul Ryan as Speaker. Now Tim Ryan has tossed his crumpled, tweed paddy cap into the ring to be House Minority Leader. I suspect a conniving plot.
We have two Irishman, both named Ryan. They’re both Reps from the rust belt. Hmmm.
Most of my readers know how fastidiously I eschew generalizations, especially when it comes to a people who are, let’s face it, all the same anyway. And I HATE to stir trouble. But…
How do we know these guys aren’t related? How do we know this isn’t some kind of Celtic plot to take over the country? Will they turn the House of Representatives into a national publican house? Will they spend their afternoons swilling cheap, raspy whiskey, singing depressing, near-tuneless ditties about the famine and telling everyone what saints their mothers were?
I suspect there to be more than one donnybrook in the cloak room. I wonder if they’re both Catholic. Saints preserve us! The next thing you know, we’ll have a plague of babies inside the beltway.
Don’t be taking me words as dismissal. Anything is better than that Pelosi creature. She’s lately looking like Skelator with a cheap wig. But whose t’ say these Ryans aren’t acting the maggot, ready to anoint themselves archbishops when no one’s looking?
It can’t hurt for us all to keep a sharp eye. That’s all I’m saying.
Matt Jordan if host of Street Politics and author of 16 20 24: A Path to Consistent Conservative Victory.
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